Monday, March 12, 2012

Marriage Monday - Love Dare 5

He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him.  Proverbs 27:14
Rudeness is doing or saying something making you unpleasant to be around.

When a man is driven by love, he intentionally behaves in a way that's more pleasant for his wife to be around.  If she desires to love him, she purposefully avoids things that frustrate him or cause him discomfort.  Likely you know they things that frustrate your husband or cause him discomfort.  When you do those things anyway, you are simply being rude to him.  I know that my husband gets frustrated when he goes to brush his teeth and the toothpaste is not easy for him to get to (our kids have the tendency to swipe our tube and leave it in their bathroom).  I have to admit that there have been times he has irritated me so I put the toothpaste in the back of the cabinet.  In the words of the little Full House cutie, "How rude!"  What I should do is make sure when I am done, the toothpaste tube goes back into his basket so that it is right there for him.

The bottom line is that genuine love minds its manners.  We expect our children to mind their manners when we are out in public.  But how can we place this expectation on them if we do not mind our manners in private?

Good manners express to your husband, "I value you enough to exercise some self-control around you.  I want to be a person who's a pleasure to be with."  Out of anger, tiredness, irritation, or whatever emotion we are experiencing, we never have the right to be rude to our mate.  We want our husband to enjoy being in our company and being rude is not the way to get to that point.

Here are three guiding principals when it comes to practicing etiquette in your marriage:
  1. Guard the Golden Rule.  Treat your mate the same way you want to be treated.  Luke 6:31
  2. No double standards.  Be as considerate to your spouse as you are to strangers or co-workers.
  3. Honor requests.  Consider what your husband asked you to do or not do.  If in doubt, ask him.
Today's Dare:

Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him to be uncomfortable or irritated with you.  You must do so without attacking him or justifying your behavior.  This is from his perspective only.  

Ladies, I greatly encourage you to do today's dare, even though it may be uncomfortable.  And remember to listen closely to what your husband is saying to you.  These are areas that make him uncomfortable and we should work on these things out of love for our men.  Take his answers to heart and do not be offended.  The purpose behind these dares is not to cause discord, but to grow our marriages.  Please share your responses here in the comments section or on our Facebook page.

Sweet Blessings~

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1 comment:

  1. Great advice! I don't know how many times I have caught myself treating others more kindly than my own husband! It's been a while, but I certainly remember doing it. Being aware of it is half the battle.

    Thanks for this amazing reminder. These principles are so good...not just for those that are married but for single couples and even those gals without a 'boyfriend' currently in their life. These principles are certain to help any kind of relationship.


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