Lessons from Eyeshadow

By: Jenifer Metzger

When it comes to eye make up, I am a very simple, neutral girl. I wear light browns and light pinks. Once in a while I'll get brave and do a red lip, but mostly, I am very basic. And I like it. One day years ago, I decided to change it up and do a smoky eye. My husband loved it and said, "You look sexy." I did my typical eye roll and said, "Sure, whatever." It's what I always do when he gives me any kind of compliment. My then my twelve year old daughter said this, "Mommy, Daddy was just telling you how pretty you are. You should say 'thank you.'"

Ouch.

Yes, I should reply with a 'thank you.'

How many times do we scoff at our husband when he hands us a compliment? Why do we do that?

I often tell my husband how good I think he looks. Whether he is dressed up for church, in his sweats and tee after a shower, or in his stinky work clothes. I always think he looks incredible and tell him so. He replies with 'thank you.' Yet, I always tell him how wrong he is when he compliments me.

Where we may see less than perfection, he sees his beautiful bride. Where we see more flaws than we can count, he sees his sexy lady. When our husband hands us a compliment, whether he says you are beautiful, stunning, lovely, gorgeous, sexy, attractive, pretty, or even nice, we need to realize that is his way of saying he loves us and is still attracted to us. Our response should always be appreciation.

When we continually ignore his compliments, two things can happen. One, he will get tired of his words being met with eye rolls and negativity that he may just stop sharing compliments altogether. Two, he might begin to question his own choices. He choose you. He loves what he sees. Yet when you discredit his words, he may begin to question his choices.

The next time your husband gives you a compliment, respond in a loving and appreciative way.

Discussion:

1. Do you struggle with accepting compliments from your husband? It can be hard since we are trained by this world to see our flaws. But the next time your husband offers a compliment, don't overthink it. Simply say, "Thank you."
2. Men like to hear compliments too. Be intentional with telling your husband how attractive you find him.