Today's Thankful Thursday post is a hard one for me. Well, part of it is. Ultimately, I am so very thankful for friends that support me no matter what. Recently, I made a startling discovery...and it's one that I hope I learn from. I am a brand new 'lead pastor' and it is quite a change from 30+ years in Children's Ministry. You see...being a lead pastor requires so much more of a person than just preaching. There are many administrative duties as well as the ministry. It is something that requires so much of one's time...so much more than I ever imagined.
So...all that being said, I am ashamed to admit that in my quest to be a 'good' pastor, I have failed in some of the follow through that is just as important as the pastoring. As a result of my failure, I believe that some of my congregation was hurt. It pains me more than I can say. I have spent much time crying and in prayer...asking for God's forgiveness for the failure and for His help to make certain that it never happens again. My personal word for 2013 is 'aware.' Well, I was not aware of some things I should have been. So...with God's help...I will be more aware in the future. I can only pray that God forgives me. I must also seek the forgiveness of those that I hurt because of my failure.
This doesn't sound much like a 'thankful' post, does it? Well, it is, because I am thankful that God allowed me to see my failure. And because of His allowing me to see it...it gives me the opportunity to grow. Failure to grow would be the worst kind of failure. So...while this tends to feel less like something for which to be thankful, I truly a thankful. I'm thankful for God's gentle correction and leading. I am thankful for friends that help me see that this can be a growing tool for me. I am thankful that when I seek forgiveness from the one's hurt, I am certain that because they love the Lord, they will forgive me and no ill feelings will prevail.
Yes, I am thankful...so very thankful.
Have a blessed day...and be thankful for the good AND the bad!