Friday, August 5, 2011

Our Words

“How important it is, then, that we mothers, shepherds of our children’s lives and hearts, choose our words to them carefully. We must deliberately aim our words at their hearts in such a way as to give our children hope, faith, strength, and also to point them toward the redeeming love of Christ. We can become the affirming voice of God to our children, just as we become a picture of his redeeming reality in their everyday lives. In this way we extend the gift of grace.”- Sally Clarkson

I read this quote from Sally Clarkson, Author of The Ministry of Motherhood and about fell out of my chair. My words don't extend grace to my kids. 99.9% of the time they get the stressed out irritated at their actions and/or their father part of me.

My husband comes home and all he wants to talk about is what went wrong at work that day, he doesn't get words of grace, I completley ignore him adding an mhm or uh huh as needed.

My daughter has an accident or steals a toy from her brother, my words aren't kind or gentle they are of anger and contempt.

My son wakes up cranky from a nap and wants to follow me around crying and upset, I sure don't show him grace or gentleness, only irritation and a short temper.

I've heard over and over and over again the woman sets the tone for her home, what tone are you setting. Tone usually indicates how we speak to our families. God's words spoke the earth into motion, Jesus spoke demons out of people and healed sick with words, words can tear down or build up. Are you making sure your tounge is building up instead of tearing down? I haven't been.

Oh Lord change my heart, mold me to who you want me to be. Teach me how to be kind and gentle. Teach me how to extend the grace that you've so freely given me. Change my heart God.

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Eph. 4:29

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Prov. 15:1


  1. I am currently reading Sally's book, and yes that thought struck me as well. I want my words and actions to show the grace and love of God to my family. Thank you for this encouragement.

  2. I believe words are powerful. Unfortunately, I don't always speak like I believe that. I want my words to bring life, not destruction, to my family. Great words of encouragement, Mandy!

  3. Beautiful Post. So challenging. My daughter is almost 2 and there is barely a moment that passes w/o her whining, if not blatant Hollaring. I pray for a spirit of grace!

    Prov. 16:24 Gracious words are a honeycomb,sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

  4. Well said! It's so difficult to maintain the Godly woman attitude and response to frustrating situations, especially when they repeat themselves each day! You brought up many situations I could SSOO identify with! But the good news is that you recognize it, and that's where God's amazing grace comes in - He's so good :) Great post!

  5. The last words to my husband at the end of a "growth opportunity" yesterday were... we need to be handing out grace and forgiveness without thought. Thanks for this Mandy, just what I needed to hear from the Lord :)

  6. I tend to be critical. Thanks for reminding me that my speech is a vital link to communion with the Lord.


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