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Today I want to talk about the hidden dangers in marriage. Those things that you think are okay, but Satan is just waiting to use them against you.
It is so easy to get caught up in the romance and forget the reality. The man in the novel may knock on her door and surprise her with a plane ride to a romantic dinner for the evening. Or he may help the young, beautiful widow sign her boys up for baseball and agree to coach them, just because he is so nice, then they fall in love. Maybe when he got home he realized he was being rude and ran out to buy her flowers and tell her how sorry he was for not being the man she needed. (yes these are actually things I read *smiles*) Reading these things can make a girl dream of her husband showing up in the middle of the day with a surprise. They can make us hope our husbands will actually apologize when they have an attitude. They give us an ideal that may not be a reality.
For awhile, I got so wrapped up in this and so disappointed that my husband wasn't like the man in my novels. God showed me that these books, these ideals, were becoming a danger to my marriage. For a season, God had me quit reading. Even though I am reading my novels again, I still have to be very careful to keep at the forefront of my mind, that these are just books. That the man I am married to, and love, is the reality.
Let's talk about facebook. This is another hidden danger in marriage. We see a friend talking about how her husband just called her just to say her loved her. Then we wonder why our husband doesn't do that. We see pictures of a friend's recent romantic getaway and how they had such a great time so we start to wish our husband would take us on a romantic vacation. Someone posts a picture of the roses her husband just sent her at work and we become upset that our husband has never done that. Oh and how about those posts that thank their husbands for cleaning up the dinner dishes, or washing her car? Then we wish our husband would send us off for a bubble bath while he cleans up dinner.
When we let these hidden dangers in our mind and heart, we start to think of how it could be different, even better. We become dissatisfied with our life and even with our spouse. This can cause us to be bitter, hurt and angry. We can even lash out at our husbands, yet they do not have a clue what they did wrong. Your husband may not be Mr. Romance. But that is okay, he is still your husband. We need to praise God for the man He gave us. We also need to praise our husbands. Maybe he didn't bring you flowers or buy you jewelry for your birthday. But find something he did do. He was home on time from work. Praise him, tell him you appreciate that. Maybe he didn't take you on an anniversary cruise, but he did pray for you when you had a headache. Praise him for that. He didn't clean up the entire dinner mess, but he did get his plate to the sink. Praise him.