How Resilience Strengthens Your Faith

 

By: Donna Bucher

An old quote, “When you are at the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on”, attributed to Theodore Roosevelt, wrapped me in Resilience this month.

Staring out the window, watching a torrential downpour batter a fledgling red maple tree, I marveled as the tiny leaves clung in desperation to thin branches as high winds bent its slender frame nearly in half.

My eyes riveted to the helpless tree, in a moment, my heart felt the same desperation; as if like the tree, all my strength strained against the force of adversity. The warm tear trailing down my cheek testified to a kinship of Resilience.

When adversity roars and overwhelm pushes you to the end of your faith; tie a knot and hold on.

Suffering, trials, and even every day challenges put us in touch with the reality of our own weaknesses, and at times our self-sufficiency.

Bringing us up short, adversity in its many forms rebukes self-sufficiency, while revealing weaknesses which may just prove our greatest strengths.

Sometimes life comes at you in relentless waves of harsh reality. Knocking you down each time you stand up, your footing becomes unstable. Ultimately, you question any possibility of remaining steady, much less moving forward.

In the onslaught of adversity, resilience strengthens your faith by enabling you to cling to Christ, girding you with the promises of His Word.

Though rudimentary in growth, the tiny leaves of the red maple clung fast to the branches of the tree. Apart from the tree, they had no hope of withstanding the storm nor life beyond it. In the same way, I am rooted and built up in Christ; and clinging to Him, my feet will not slip.

Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving.

 

Colossians 2:6-7

Resilience Takes Hold of Christ

Adversity, like unwanted noise, distracts your focus from what is most important. Whether unexpected bad news or another financial burden, you vehemently cling to that which you may lose, in a vain attempt at control.

Yet Resilience bids you, “take hold of Christ, for He has taken hold of you.” (Philippians 3:12) How do you take hold of Christ in suffering and adversity?

Let Go. You cannot hold both God and the problem; surrender the situation completely to God. Relinquish control to God. Release desired outcomes into God’s sovereign hands.

Lean in. Press into Christ and all He has for you in the suffering or adversity. Pray for God’s strength to keep you in His way.

Resilience strengthens your faith by first empowering you to take hold of Christ.

Resilience Keeps Hold of Christ

When faced with suffering and adversity, taking hold of Christ stops a downward spiral of despair. Keeping a hold on Christ infuses hope into extended suffering, because you have a constant reminder of His faithfulness. (1 Thessalonians 5:23-24)

Resilience keeps you holding on to Christ as you:

Trust. Believing Christ’s promise of His Presence with you always keeps you secure in His love. Choose the truth of His Word over the lies of the evil one and noise of your suffering.

Rest. Cease from striving; relax into the truth of Christ’s promises. Spend quiet time with Him, reminding yourself of His goodness in all His ways with you.

Resilience strengthens your faith by first empowering you to take hold of Christ, and once you take hold, resilience positions you for keeping a hold on Christ.

Resilience Never Lets Go of Christ

As you keep holding onto Christ, you learn trusting and resting in Him increases your faith by infusing hope into your situation. As hope increases, during seasons of extended suffering and trial, you move closer to God. Determining to never let go of Christ. (Hebrews6:19-20)

Resilience postures you for never letting go of Christ when you:

Love. As you cling to Christ, you know Him more deeply, leading to loving Him more passionately. The beauty here becomes clinging = more love, more love=more clinging.

Praise. Worship Christ in the dark, the hard, and the pain. Declare your love, trust, and faithfulness to Him.

Resilience strengthens your faith by first empowering you to take hold of Christ, and once you take hold, resilience positions you for keeping a hold on Christ. As you keep a hold on Christ, resilience binds you to Christ in an intimacy so precious, you never let go of Christ.

As you practice taking hold of Christ, keeping a hold of Christ, and never letting go of Christ, when you face adversity, your faith builds a resilience which will keep you tethered to Christ in every storm of life.

Reflection:

Which of the three areas mentioned above do you find most difficult in trials?

What one step can you take today to move closer to Christ?

Find more encouragement and FREE Resources at Serenity in Suffering!

 

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Letting Go of Mother's Day Expectations

By: Jenifer Metzger

In the week leading up to Mother's Day, I always see countless memes making rounds on social media that all center around what moms want. Included are things like sleeping all day, breakfast in bed, staying in jammies in the house alone while watching movies, a clean house cleaned by someone other than you, and spa days. Yet the reality is, that probably won't happen for very many of us. After all, Mother's Day is on a Sunday (Seriously! I vote we move Mother's Day and Father's Day to Saturdays! Who's with me?).

Your day will probably go something more like: wake up super early, get ready for church, rush to get the kids ready for church, something will go wrong because it always does on Sunday morning, then run late for church despite your best effort to be on time. Lounging around probably won't happen. Then you'll probably miss your Sunday nap in order to spend time with the family. A clean house? Probably not because really, who's house stays clean through the busyness of Sundays! And the spa day or other expensive gifts? That might not happen either.

Maybe Mother's Day is always hard for you. Gathering with family can sometimes lead to a disagreement with a relative, kids still fight on Mother's Day, and sometimes we feel the disappointment of not getting the gift you hope for or you feel like your husband just doesn't understand Mother's Day.

Your husband and gift giving.

Your husband can't read your mind even one tiny bit. Those hints dropped via memes or ads on Facebook, he probably won't catch. If there is something you really want or need, tell him directly. Be clear.

Sometimes we want extravagant gifts, like jewelry, a new name brand handbag, or a spa day. While he may desire to give that gift to you, maybe it is not in the budget. Don't stress him out worrying how he is going to afford the gift of your dreams. Let him off the hook a bit.

If you receive a gift that leaves you wondering why he thought that was a good Mother's Day gift, think back. Have you ever said you wanted this item? Have you ever expressed any interest? In his mind he possibly thought he was honoring you with a great gift. One year my husband gifted me a large skillet. This thing is huge! People thought it was an odd gift, but the truth is, I had mentioned several times how awesome it would be to have a skillet that size. He remembered that and got one for me. I love it because he remembered something I truly wanted and needed.

Your children and gift giving.

Your precious little ones will probably make you a handmade card full of misspelled words and grade school artistry. You might receive a bouquet of dandelions. And you'll likely receive a hug with an enthusiastic "Happy Mother's Day mommy!" These gifts remind me of the widow's mite in Luke 21. The rich men came to the temple to give their offerings. They put in large sums of money. But the thing is, because they were rich, these large sums of money were nothing to them. They weren't sacrificing anything. Then a widow comes and puts in a few small coins. Nothing compared to the offerings of the rich men. Yet her offering was honored far more because she was very poor and gave everything she had. Your little one is giving you a hug and a smile which might not seem like a lot compared to a gift bag filled with an expensive gift, but she is giving you everything she has, herself.

The gift of family and love.

Literally every single Mother's Day my husband and I go to bed at night and he apologizes that my day wasn't special. Every year. Now here's the thing. Our Mother's Day is always beautiful. When the kids were younger, he would get me a small gift from him and the kids and the kids made me cards. Now that my kids are adults, they normally work together to organize a nice gift for me and we have a family lunch. It's a crazy busy day and there's not always a lot of gift exchanging. But there is a ton of family and love. And that is what makes it special. So every year my answer to my husband is the same, "I loved my Mother's Day. I was with my family and that is all that matters."

If we never get another Mother's Day gift, friends, that would be okay. It's not really about the gifts. It's all about family. It's all about love. I promise if you ask a woman who no longer has her mother here with her or who has lost a child, she would far more want her loved one back than any expensive gift, clean home, or spa day.

Don't be disappointed or let down. Don't be discouraged or feel unappreciated. Cherish what you do have. Enjoy those moments with your loved ones.

Discussion:
1. How do you normally spend Mother's Day?
2. What is a favorite gift you have given or received for Mother's Day?

The Day my Toddler Reminded me to Pray

 By: Rebekah Hargraves

Photo Courtesy Of: David Beale

"Pray without ceasing." ~1 Thessalonians 5:17

As parents, our tendency is oftentimes to spend so much time thinking about and fretting over all the lessons and truths we need to impart to our children. After all, we want them to be obedient, respectful, loving, kind, compassionate, patient, gracious, honoring people and firm graspers, believers, and doers of truth. However, in the midst of all this focus on what we need to teach them, I think we sometimes loose sight of something very valuable. And that is that God created parenthood to teach us a lot! Our children are daily used by God to sanctify us, to teach us more about His ways and His heart for us as His children, and to remind us of what is most important in life. 

Such was the case for me several years back. 

From the time Anna, our now 9 year old, was very little, my husband Owen has done a wonderful job of introducing her to the concept of prayer, teaching her to hold our hands and to sit quietly each evening as he leads us in prayer before dinner. She caught on to this amazingly quickly - even as a toddler, whenever Owen would reach out for her hand, she knew exactly what was going on and would, in turn, reach out for my hand so we could all pray together.

Unfortunately, while Owen has been faithful to daily lead us in prayer before dinner, I have not always been so good about remembering to do the same with Anna (and now our son, James, as well) before lunch when it is just us at home. Not only that, but unfortunately, I all too often don’t even take the time to actually sit down at the table with the kids at lunch time to have a nice, leisurely lunch with them. Too often, I’m too distracted thinking about my to-do list and trying to get things done while the kids eat lunch and I eat on the move. But, by God’s grace, there was a moment several years ago that the Lord brings back to mind on occasion, when I was intentional about preparing our lunch, setting it on the table, and sitting down beside my sweet girl (who was then 19 months old). 

Yet again, however, my “busyness” and quickness of doing things that day caused me to just start eating, without any thought to what I should have done to start our time over our meal together. But the next thing I knew, my then 19 month old daughter impacted me in a powerful way and taught me two valuable lessons through one simple little gesture. 

While I had been focused on beginning to eat, Anna interestingly had not yet taken one single bite and the next thing I knew, had reached over and taken my hand. Surprised, I looked down to see her staring up at me with anticipation. I knew exactly what she was wanting. “Do you want to pray, Anna?”, I asked her. “Uh huh!”, she nodded excitedly in return, her whole face lit up. In that moment, my sweet little girl, at just a year and a half, taught me some really special lessons I desperately needed - and still do need to this day, seven years later. 

For one thing, she saw prayer as something we should just do before we eat. And you know what? She was right! And yet I had allowed my own interests, fast-paced busyness, to-dos, and concerns crowd out what was most important in that moment – acknowledging God and placing Him first and modeling to my daughter what that looked like. Instead, she did those very things for me. She modeled for me that which I should have been modeling for her. And that touched me deeply.

Secondly, after that initial prayer time with her and a few minutes into our lunch time, she reached for my hand yet again! “Anna, are you wanting to pray again?”  “Uh huh!”  More excited nodding, her eyes shining. This continued three or four more times over the course of our lunch, each time with me being careful to take a moment and think of something else to pray for with my daughter. Because believe you me – if my girl wants to pray, pray is what we will do! She modeled for me in those moments such a love for, enjoyment of, and excitement for prayer, that it blew me away! The last thing I wanted to do was to douse or discourage that excitement, so each time, I came up with yet another thing to pray to God about, at my daughter’s insistence and encouragement. 

How I thank God for the example my daughter was to me that afternoon and for the valuable lessons she taught me! How often we as adults simply get too busy or too distracted to pray. How often we fail to “pray without ceasing ( 1 Thess. 5:17). How often we find ourselves viewing prayer as boring, too time-consuming, or a worthless endeavor. The Lord knew I and my prayer life needed that precious example my daughter afforded me that day of yearning to pray, seeing prayer as something exciting and enjoyable, and having the desire to pray again and again. 

So, today, I want to slow down. I want to savor the moment and make the most of it. I want to look my sweet children in the eyes and learn all I can from them. After all, the very Kingdom of God itself belongs to those who are as little children ( Matthew 19:14, Luke 18:16). 

Do I as a Mom have a legitimate and huge responsibility to teach my daughter important life lessons? Of course! But I need to also get off my high horse of thinking I have all the answers and possess all the wisdom and knowledge and look to her and see what lessons of childlike faith the Lord would have me learn through her. Never underestimate the rich source of wisdom and insight your little dear ones can be to you! Don’t miss out on the lessons. Don’t turn a blind eye to what the Lord would have you learn through your little children. For they truly are better examples of faith, trust, unconditional love, right priorities, kindness, and a whole host of other wonderful characteristics than we often give them credit for! 

Reflection Questions: 

1) How have your children made a spiritual impact on your heart and life? 

2) What important lesson has one of your children illustrated for you lately? 

"Do You Wish to be Well?"

 By: Joanne Viola

We find in Scripture the story of the pool of Bethesda. The sick would come and sit there, and wait for the waters to stir. The one who was able to get in the waters would receive healing from whatever was ailing them.

An ill man was there one day. Jesus knew from his condition he had been ill for a very long time, and Scripture tells us it had been thirty eight years.

A long time indeed to not feel well, day in and day out. It wears on one’s spirit. Hopelessness can set in as no relief is in sight.

Yet Jesus asks him a very peculiar question:

“He *said to him, “Do you wish to get well?”
(John 5:6, NASB)

Like who would not wish to get well?

Humans are fixers by nature. We repair, mitigate, ease, and soften.

There is a difference between fixing and healing.

Fixing implies a one and done action, as in, we fix the leak in our faucet. Healing can come one of two ways – instantaneously or over the course of time.

Our problem is that we grow impatient.

We want our problems fixed as then we won’t need to deal with them any longer. But sometimes, change comes through a healing process, like chemo, which happens over a span of weeks or months.

Sanctification, the action of being free of sin, is a healing process. It takes place over the course of our lives. It is also a process in the lives of other people.

Jesus knew the man had been ill for a long time. He knew the man longed for healing, to be freed from the sickness which had a grip on his life.

Yet He still asked him, “Do you wish to be well?”

Jesus offered him compassion and relationship before He brought about the healing of the man’s physicality.

He does the same today for us. He enters our situations, illnesses, friendships, and addictions with compassion, offering us the gift of a relationship with Him. He walks with us and talks with us, bringing hope into our impossibilities.

And we need to do the same for others. Enter their situations, walk through with them, and offer compassion. We cannot fix them. But we can bring them to the One who can heal them.

“Do you wish to get well?”
Let’s not grow impatient with ourselves,
or others.

“Let us not lose heart in doing good,
for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.
So then, while we have opportunity,
let us do good to all people,
and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.”
(Galatians 6:9-10, NASB)

 

 

Reflection:
Do you grow impatient with waiting for healing, or change, to come into your life?
How can we grow more patient as we wait for healing to come to the lives of those we love?

 

Image by Jean photosstock from Pixabay

 

Cracks in the Armor | Leaning In, Not Out

 

By: Paula Short

The "Strong Christian Woman" Trope: A Double-Edged Sword

The image of the "strong Christian woman" is ubiquitous. She juggles work, family, and church with a smile, facing challenges with unwavering faith. While this image can be inspiring, it can also create unrealistic pressure for Christian women to be stoic and self-sufficient.

The Pressure to be Perfect

This trope often hides the very real struggles women face. We can feel pressure never to show weakness, have unwavering faith even in doubt, and shoulder burdens alone. 

The pressure to be the "Strong Christian Woman" can be suffocating. We internalize the message that any display of weakness is a failure of faith. This can lead to feelings of isolation, shame, and burnout.

Vulnerability: A Sign of Strength, Not Weakness

The Bible is filled with stories of strong women who were also vulnerable. Esther, despite fear, approached the king to save her people (Esther 4:16). Deborah, a prophetess, led with courage but acknowledged the need for assistance from Barak (Judges 4:8). These women demonstrate that strength doesn't mean hiding weakness, but rather facing it head-on with faith and the support of others.

But what if true strength lies not in constant self-reliance but in vulnerability? Sharing our struggles with trusted friends or a faith-based therapist can be a powerful act of courage. In vulnerability, we open ourselves to God's grace and the support of others.

Seeking Support is a Spiritual Act

Proverbs 11:14 (NIV) tells us, "For lack of guidance a nation falls, but victory is won through many advisors." Seeking help and support from a trusted friend or relative is not a sign of weakness; it's an act of faith and wisdom. Sharing our burdens allows others to offer prayers, encouragement, and practical assistance.

True Christian strength lies in the beautiful paradox of being both strong and vulnerable. When we embrace our vulnerabilities and seek support from trusted friends or our faith community, we not only find relief but also deepen our connections and experience the true power of God working through us, not despite our weaknesses.

Remember, dear sister, you are not alone. God desires a relationship with you and your whole self – strengths and weaknesses. Lean on your trusted friends and faith community, open your heart to vulnerability, and experience the true meaning of Christian strength.

Let's Reflect

1. How has the "strong Christian woman" trope impacted your life?
2. Have you felt pressure to hide your struggles?
3. In what ways do you feel pressure to be the "Strong Christian Woman?"
4. This week, how can you practice vulnerability with a trusted friend or family member?