Monday, August 1, 2011

Marriage Monday

Today I am going to be completely transparent with you girls.  I did not want to write on marriage today.  I just didn't.  It has been a really rough weekend.  I have felt extremely tired.  My husband has been working very hard between his job and working at our church on a remodel and he is tired.  And let's just be honest ladies, men have pms too!  That's right, he is very moody right now!  Our weekend was full of "growth opportunities."

As I sat down to write for this post today I cried.  I argued with God.  I felt so unworthy of writing a post on marriage when I haven't said one nice sentence to my husband all weekend, when I haven't told him I love him all weekend, when I just want to run in the opposite direction of him.

Then I heard Matthew West's new song, Strong Enough, playing on the radio.  I cried harder.  God I am not strong enough for this.  I am a horrible wife, how can I encourage women in marriage?  That's when God told me I didn't have to be strong enough, He is.

Every marriage has these growth opportunities.  The goal is to actually use them to grow.  How can we grow? 
  • Be slow to speak.
  • Really listen to what your spouse is saying.
  • Never bring up past arguments or failures.
  • Keep the argument between the two of you.  Do not include friends, family or your kids.
  • Try telling your spouse how you are feeling, not what they are doing wrong.
My marriage is not perfect, far from it actually.  But I am committing to using this growth opportunity to grow.  The next time you want to run in the opposite direction of your man, remember to use the moment to grow and become closer to your hubby.  Now, if you will excuse me, I need to go tell my husband I love him.

Sweet Blessings~


  1. Boy do I know exactly how you are feeling today last night was ROUGH for us too but I'm so thankful when we aren't strong enough God is.

  2. Hi Jenifer - Growth opportunities - hmmm, definitely a better way to look at it than my last 2 weeks worth of frustration and aggravation. Thanks for the kick in the pants and the encouragement to look at things differently.
    God bless
    ps: the best person to encourage others is one who knows.

  3. I have been right there with ya. Ministry add's a thousand more little stressers on a relationship.
    When he says things that really frustrate me, and he, out of frustrations says, "What did I say!" I've started telling him here is what you said and this is how I take it. Not that it's over silly petty stuff where I'm just wanting a fight, thats wrong on a whole different level, it's over we're in the midst of a trial and I see 1 giagantic big picture and his comment means he's not taking into consideration a larger part of the situation.

  4. Ok, clearly satan is up to something. With Mandy's comment and my own experience, I know of 4 couples that had "growth opportunities" this weekend. I am not strong enough to be all that God has called me to be, including a wife, but God is strong enough! Thank you for your transparency and honesty, Jenifer. I'm walking right there with you. :)

  5. Jenifer,

    Well if helps us single people have growth opportunities too (smiles) anxiety and fear has had a hold on me the past of couple of days. Praise God for being strong enough to get us through our growth times.

    Blessings to you Jennifer.

  6. I love how sometimes God uses the opportunities to talk to us as we are supposed to be talking to others. So glad that you are off to tell your husband how much you love him. I pray peace and joy and love during this time of busyness. May you both have time to reconnect.

  7. Thank you for your honesty. Marriage is definitely one of the areas where Satan strikes the hardest and because of this, in the heat of the battle, my husband and I often have to stop and remind ourself (and each other!) who our real enemy is. We are on the same side and if we are to be victorious we cannot allow Satan to divide and conquer. Great post.

  8. Love what you ladies do here!

    I have a good friend who says when your husband is most unlovable is when they need the most love. Tough, but true.

  9. I think we all have times like that. And I know I feel horrible when it happens to us. I actually like when bloggers are honest. Makes me feel better :) We all like it when people are human. I hope you have a better week.


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